Animated by Love

Some of our men have such an enormous amount of energy that I can hardly compete with them. I wonder from where they get so much energy to go on working almost like a machine. During the last few days of organizing a fitting farewell for one of our companions, I realized that many of us had put our shoulders together to make this a memorable day, and I do feel that our friend would be smiling even as I anticipate his reaction to our humble efforts. We have our differences, but when it comes to organizing an event such as this, our men do it wonderfully well. We can get over our differences, and think alike in getting the best of what we have and what we are. That is what I am thankful to God today, for our men who could give their best when needed.

Now coming to the secret of their energy, this is not something so very new and spectacular. I realize when we have love for a person or a group of people, we would go all extent to give our best for them, and that I realize is the secret of their immense energy. The love we had for this of our sick Brother, whose both the kidneys failed and was on dialysis twice a week, was something remarkable. Since I stayed in a house a little far from where this friend stayed, I could not spare much time for him, but those who were members of this community, had gone out of their way to be available to meet his needs, especially accompanying him to the hospital for dialysis and bringing him back… it was not an easy task, and they did this with great love.

Yesterday I had gone to the college to check certain things for today’s funeral, and I realized that three of our men who were involved with the preparations were not there, and I could guess that they might have gone out. And a little later I came to know from the notice board that they had gone to the market. When I had finished my other works and was about to leave, I saw these three men climbing up the stairs with lots of flowers. One of them said smiling “3 Idiots”, and I know he made a reference to the recent film of the same title, which supposedly showcased the achievements of three idiots. What a combination, I wondered for a while, and yet, when it came to preparations for the day, there was good understanding, and I had not seen them fighting over any silly things.

In fact, as we bade farewell to our friend, what I heard from several people who expressed their sentiments for him was so very heart-renting that I felt they had all experienced it. Our friend was known for having a special love for people who approached him for either a service, or favor or work done by him. He did it with great love, and during the lunch today one of the priests of the diocese said that the departed friend was going out of his way to make the Sisters happy and at home; he would take them by the vehicle and drop them at a place from where they could get express buses, and many people appreciated this gentle and lovely gesture of the man. He was not after money, or after name and fame; he was a simple man, who valued people for what they were, and he did not hesitate to make special provisions to accommodate them that they felt handled with great love and care.

If the man had so much of energy to be involved with so many works, and be on his toes to get different things going during his tenure as in-charge of the estate, it was just because he was in love with the place and the people, and that is what made many of the people to shed tears today, as his body was lowered to the tomb. One of the girls, aged some 12, was crying profusely, because she had seen him around as she grew from the age of 3 or 4, and she had known the man he was, and it might have been difficult for her to bid goodbye to him. If we are not able to give our full selves for the work assigned to us, or that we often get into problems completing the works or find it hard to work with co-workers, the first question that we need to ask ourselves is this : am I in love with the place and the people associated with this work, or am I doing it just as a job assigned to me. The aspect of doing anything for the love of the persons associated with, can make a lot of difference.

Nursing Naturally

Being in a religious house, I understand, I am spared from much of pain and agony that my family members go through every now and then. After a few days, my father is not well again, and every time when one of the family members falls sick, it becomes a matter of concern for all the members. He had eaten only in the morning, and says he does not feel like eating; there is a sense of nausea, so typical of those who are sick for some days. But the fact that he has not eaten has worried my mother, sister, and niece. Each of them have their own load of worries, and when my father falls sick, all of them are deeply worried, and do what they can to get him alright.

I felt the words of my mother hard to digest; she finds it hard to see my father, who for the most part of his life had been quite healthy, lying down helplessly. My parents are used to fighting constantly, especially when my father goes hiding with his bottle, but at a moment like this, my mother is all caring. I had experienced her care when I was sick many years ago. I might have been some seven years then, but still remember quite clearly how she nursed me and made me healthy. She feels sad that my father is not able to eat, not able to contain himself. My sister had bought a loaf of bread after her school hours, so that he could eat something before going to bed. But he refuses to eat even that.

We become quite different when we are sick, especially when we are down with a relatively major sickness, including malaria, typhoid, pneumonia and the type. On the one hand, we become quite helpless, and require the help and assistance of people around us; on the other we feel sad to bother and disturb others to help us. While we may feel hard to swallow even the liquid food, especially when we lose appetite, others may think that we are just staging. Pretence is the last thing that any sick person would resort to, and what can work wonders is a greater dose of understanding and support to the person who is sick.

Sometimes I feel the importance of having a family, friends and relatives, when I am sick; there were times when my companions in the house did not even know that I was sick, even as I did not join the meals or other common community programs. Loneliness has haunted me at such moments, but I realize this is part of our cross. Some communities are lucky to have such a motherly person as ‘minister’, who would go out of his way to take good care of the members under his care. But such persons are only rare and exceptions. More than at other occasions, we need the love and care of community and companions at the time of our sickness, because those are the moments we feel ourselves so very vulnerable and helpless.

I know one thing for sure, that my father would listen to me, and that is the reason why I spoke to him a few words to encourage him to eat and go to bed. Knowingly or unknowingly we also like the little attention of other family members when we are sick. I remember how one of our senior fathers was so very delighted to have a cup of soup every day, during his 20 days of stay at a nursing home, and I would not be surprised that it was the soup and the loving care of sisters and friends which had restored his health so soon. More than medicine, what is required when we are sick, is the loving care of the companions and friends. This alone can do miracles when we are sick and bring us back to health.

Business of Bothering

Walking down the prestigeous Park Street, now Mother Teresa Sarani, every day has made me realise that drug addiction is an open reality that no one bothers about today. On three locations on the pavement, I can see middle-aged men huddled together, sometimes partially covering themselves with a dirty towel around, experimenting with drugs to get one fine "kick". I also see often one very thin, skinny-looking lady doing it all by herself. Two days ago, I had seen this lady with another man, whom I am tempted to think her companion, initiating this noble art of taking drugs to a boy of about 12 years. As I passed by, I was tempted to stop there, and shout at the youngster sitting cozily between this man and the woman. The boy was far too young to enter into the world of drugs. But the very moment I realised, but what if they were to tell me, "What is your problem? Mind your own business!"

One of the main problems haunting the modern world is that we mind only our own business, and don't bother to look a little beyond our own selves. We are too afraid to cross the lakshman-rekha that we ourselves have drawn. No one can deny the fact that we have become far too individualistic today that a few years ago. We live in a world where what really matters is my family, my friends, my relatives, and my acquaintances. There are often deaths, suicides in flats just opposite to mine, and yet I may not even know who it is, what has happened to the persons, ... We are learning the art of insulating our lives, keeping a safe distance from others... and it will not take too long for us to realise that we have alienated ourselves from the rest of humanity, a mistake that will take centuries to correct.

Why should I bother about my neighbour? I have all the resons to, and it would be a grave "sin" against humanity and against the universe, if I fail to bother. It is true there are times when I am questioned by others, "but what is your problem? Why dont you mind your own business?" And the next time, I dont dare to repeat it. Why should I dirty my hands unnecessarily? Imagine, if all of us were to mind our own business, then the world will become one big factory, where each of the machines will do its part, and ... If we were to stretch the imagery, we will realise that problem with one part will affect the entire output.

We do not realise the fact that we live in a world where each one of us have a role to play, and in order to strike balance in the world, every one needs to be healthy. We often say, healthy persons make a healthy society. We are duty-bound at the welfare of each of our neighbours... This is what is so very unique to human beings... but what we see in reality is that we often behave worse than animals... hoarding, self-centredness, vengeance, jealousy, these are the vices not known to the animals. Care and concern for the neighbours is not necessarily a religious virtue, but a basic human virtue. It is time that we wake up from the slumber and look at the world around us, and do our part to show that we truly care for the world and the universe.

Today I would like to pause two or three times during the day at different situations, and ask myself this question : how can I show through my actions at this juncture that I care for the world and the people around me? I dont need to think of something heroic, or noble; it may be a silly act of charity or concern for the people or nature; what is more important is that I begin to educate my mind to make these things happen automatically, without consciously doing them. If at the end of the day, I can tell myself that I was able to do such and such act to show my concern for the world, then I can really be happy. For happiness is born when I go out of myself to stretch out my hand to reach out to the needy.