Monday, January 11, 2010

Fear Factor (1)

If there is one key to disaster in one's persona life, it is certainly the 'fear factor'. Fear, triggered by whatever it may be, can be fatal; what it does is to cripple one's confidence in oneself, in the world around and in God (or the Supreme Being, if you wish). And what is this fear, that can create havoc in our lives, and how do we handle them? These are not simple questions which can be answered in a few words; the greatest teacher, who can explain to us threadbare the answers to these questions, is undoubtedly life itself. But let us point out to a few guideposts which may come handy when in need.

One thing is for sure: fear is for the most part imaginary! We may assume that there is an objective fact behind the fear, but that is not the case. Take for instance, one of the most common fears is of failure. Most of us are frightened of failures - of future, success in examinations, career, relationships, and we imagine failure to happen in all possible areas of our personal and social lives. There are persons who assert that they were frightened of failure (which they swear was real), and they had to face it! The fact is one of the most important reasons for failure was not the person was incapable of success, but the fear!

The objective situations for all those who face examinations remain the same, and the basic capability to get through the examinations is also the same in most cases, and yet how is it that some manage to fail! Were they destined to fail? Of course not! There is nothing pre-destined! Once fear cripples our confidence and positive thinking, already then the failure has begun. The reverse can also be true; those who are not intellectually so gifted, and yet due to their confidence and perseverance, would get through the examinations easily, and confidently. That was just to show what fear can do to us!

Another popular misconception regarding fear is that it is universal; it is true all of us are afraid of something or other; have we not heard about great war heroes and police commanders who are afraid of cockroaches or garden lizards? Or well educated women who are frightened of frogs? But as we grow up in life, we keep shedding most of the fears, and if we fail to shed them, but cling to them, that is where the problem starts. Is it not true that there are more people who would think a rope to be a snake in darkness, and experience certain fear deep within? All that would free them fear is to throw a small stone at it, or stir it with a stick!

The objective reality outside of us does not change, but only our thinking changes; the snake does not become a rope nor does the rope becomes a snake; but the thinking goes through a change in our mind, from day to night. But is there a way of asserting the reality as it is, instead of putting an extra label on it, as something what it is not? It is possible through mind assertion! In the mind I need to assert that it is not a snake but merely a rope! Mind you, this can make miracles - with mind assertion, even if it is a snake, for instance, and still you will be able to get over it with great ease and confidence!

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